Addendum to Through The Fire
Last night I was able to go outside and spend a really nice bit of time with the Lord, as I gazed at the moon and enjoyed the warmth of the air. I started meditating on part of Psalm 8, which I had read in the morning, which says,
“When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?” (vs.3-4)
And I began pondering the huge expanse of the universe and how the earth itself is not even equal to a pinprick in the midst of the vastness…and then there are a couple billion people inhabiting the earth – and we are so small in comparison – and then if you single out just me, in the midst of ALL those people, on the huge earth, in the infinitely MORE huge universe…well…I began to feel kind of insignificant and small. And I asked God, “Why? Why did you create me? Why did you create humankind; such small, frail creatures inhabiting a planet in the floating in space?”
There was a short silence, and I sat there on the fence, as the soft glow of the moon silhouetted the branches around me, and an owl hooted in the distance. Then I felt like He whispered to me, “I am preparing a bride for myself, to spend eternity with me. A bride I can cherish, and who can delight in me forever.”
Then it suddenly dawned on me that, if I am truly aware of what serving God means, and what it could mean giving up….and if I am truly surrendering my desires to the Lord…then something should replace it. And that something is the Lord. And He must become my greatest love. My first love. I was created to love Him. And as I sat there cloaked in the darkness, bathed in the light of the moon, my heart was bursting with love for Him, and delight in His presence and goodness, and I just asked Him to sit down beside me, and walk with me…and I ended up spending twice as much time outside as I had intended to, just because I didn’t want to leave His side.
“I am my Beloved’s and he is mine!”
I was able to relate this sudden realization with the experience of the other day which I wrote about in my previous blog post, and that just made it all the more sweet and special. God loves me and is there right beside me every moment of every day. He cares for me even more than any earthly person ever could, and He can change me and fill me with true joy and peace and love.
When we give up one thing to the Lord, He fills that place with His Spirit, and more of Himself. It’s not a dismal thing; it doesn’t leave us with a great emptiness…because when we give something to the Lord, He can then bless us and fill that place which used to be taken over by”other things” with Himself.